Instructions For Being Alone

800_Hanging_onto_the_Kitchen_Table

by Zoë Pollock

After a bad breakup, Tracy Clark-Flory consulted the experts for some advice:

I thought I’d be good at this alone thing by now. I’m an only child, for crying out loud. Instead, on the heels of another split, I’m amazed at how difficult just being by myself can be. I have friends – they are wonderful — but I feel a suffocating solitude at the end of the night, in the morning or at any moment of the day that isn’t scheduled with distraction. It wasn’t this way when I was coupled. Just the knowledge that I had “a person” to call my own (even though I know in my bones that you can never truly call another person “your own”) was a comfort; that knowledge itself was a constant companion. 

Judy Ford, author of Single: The Art of Being Satisfied, Fulfilled and Independent, points the way after the jump:

Her practical tips for conquering solitude are to get creative (“creativity is the cure of loneliness”), push yourself to “do something you have never done before” (like taking yourself out to dinner), admit your loneliness to others (“you might be surprised that they feel lonely too”), “get cozy with the gaps,” those empty spaces in between plans, and remind yourself, “Loneliness is not going to kill me.” These aren’t easy fixes — and may induce eye-rolls from self-help haters — but they’re crucial to happiness, she argues: “To experience wholeness, first we experience the void.”

Slate excerpts part of Michael Cobb’s Single: Arguments for the Uncoupled:

Certainly being single is a variation on being individual. Even Thoreau had to keep reassuring us that he was not too lonely in the woods: “I am no more lonely than a single mullein or dandelion in a pasture, or a bean leaf, or sorrel, or a horse-fly, or a bumble-bee.” I’m not sure if he can prove or commit too many pathetic fallacies in these comparisons. Such rhetoric betrays a sense that the question of his loneliness is still very much open, and something about individualism must be thought about as we consider the single.

We’ve previously covered Cobb’s book on the Dish here and here.

(Photo courtesy of Lee Materazzi, via Flavorwire)

via The Daily Dish | By Andrew Sullivan http://andrewsullivan.thedailybeast.com/2012/08/instructions-for-being-alone.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+andrewsullivan%2FrApM+%28The+Daily+Dish%29

How MTV is Hurting Obama’s Democratic National Convention


Planners hoping to score big-name acts for the party’s September pow-wow are worried about those double-booked VMAs.

read more

via Hollywood Reporter http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/mtv-obama-democratic-national-parade-359249?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+thr%2Fnews+%28The+Hollywood+Reporter+-+Top+Stories%29

The Romney Hood Fairy Tale

The false, invented analysis behind Obama’s tax claims.

via WSJ.com: Today's Most Popular http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10000872396390443792604577574910276629448.html?mod=rss_Today’s_Most_Popular

Republicans Split Over Prospect of Ryan as Veep

Politico: “As Mitt Romney’s vice presidential selection nears and buzz about Rep. Paul Ryan’s prospects builds, a split is emerging among Republicans about whether the choice of the House Budget chairman and architect of the party’s controversial tax and spending plan would be a daring plus for the ticket or a miscalculation that would turn a close election into a referendum on Medicare.”

“Ryan advocates… believe Romney will lose if he doesn’t make a more assertive case for his candidacy and that selecting the 42-year-old wonky golden boy would sound a clarion call to the electorate about the sort of reforms the presumptive GOP nominee wants to bring to Washington…”

“Their opposites, pragmatic-minded Republican strategists and elected officials, believe that to select Ryan is to hand President Obama’s campaign a twin-edged blade, letting the incumbent slash Romney on the Wisconsin congressman’s Medicare proposal and carve in the challenger a scarlet ‘C’ for the unpopular Congress.”

via Taegan Goddard's Political Wire http://politicalwire.com/archives/2012/08/08/republicans_split_over_prospect_of_ryan_as_veep.html?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+PoliticalWire+%28Political+Wire%29

Why a Paul Ryan VP Selection Wouldn’t Add Up for Mitt Romney

Even if he wanted to choose the Wisconsin representative, why would Ryan want to leave his powerful post in the House?

romneyryan.banner.reuters.jpg

Reuters

If whispers are any gauge — and who knows? — Rep. Paul Ryan seems to have made a late charge into the shortlist for Mitt Romney’s vice-presidential nominee. The New Yorker just published a long profile of the Wisconsin wonk, and he scored a high-profile boost over the weekend when The Weekly Standard‘s Stephen Hayes and Bill Kristol wrote a plea for either Ryan or Marco Rubio to be the running mate:

The 2010 election was the best for Republicans in a long time. Ryan and Rubio embody the spirit of 2010. [Tim] Pawlenty and [Rob] Portman [[LINK HERE]] don’t. But beyond all of the calculations — beyond demography, geography, and the polls — is the most compelling reason for Romney to pick Ryan or Rubio: Doing so would signal that Romney understands the magnitude of the problems facing the country and would demonstrate that he has the will to solve them.

Still, Ryan seems like a pretty serious long-shot for the spot, and not just because Bill Kristol is almost always wrong about everything (I explained why Rubio, for his part, was an unlikely pick back in May).

With Ryan, the strengths and weaknesses come back to one thing: His sweeping vision of the federal budget. Ryan is the chairman of the House Budget Committee, and he’s used that perch to push for serious changes to the government, especially transforming Medicaid into block grants to states and making deep cuts to the federal budget elsewhere. It’s that sort of aggressive talk that endears him to people like Kristol (and the conservative base); it also makes him an easy target for the other side, since voters tend to be horrified by deep cuts to entitlements and anything else that entails serious upwards redistribution of wealth.

No one disagrees about this — the question is how they conduct the cost-benefit analysis. Kristol and Hayes, for example, argue that Romney has already embraced Ryan’s budget to such a degree that he might as well go whole-hog, since Democrats will already lump them together. Fellow conservative Byron York, however, counters that while Ryan and Romney agree on many things, the presidential candidate has mostly shied away from the most politically toxic parts of the Ryan plan: “Yes, Romney talks about bringing federal spending under control. But Ryan-like plans to curb entitlement spending? That’s just not something Romney emphasizes.” Democrats fantasize over the idea of running against Ryan, so Republicans would face an onslaught, but a strong sell on an aggressive platform might be just what Romney needs to close the gap with Obama.

What else would Ryan bring to the table? He’s very young — just 42 years old. Wisconsin remains a likely Obama win, but Republicans have been eying the state since Gov. Scott Walker defeated his recall vote in June, and a Public Policy Polling survey in July found that adding Ryan to the ticket would essentially bring the race to a tie. Like Romney and the other names at the top of his shortlist — Pawlenty, Portman — Ryan is a sober, straightforward Midwestern-born white guy with a head for numbers and good hair. Like them, he wouldn’t add much in the foreign policy department. And he’s never run in any constituency larger his congressional district, which centers on a town where his family has been prominent for generations. While he might be a very effective nationwide campaigner, he’s simply not proven.

Perhaps a more important question than whether Romney would want Ryan is whether Ryan would have any interest in the job. Even though Dick Cheney and Joe Biden have both expanded the power of the vice presidency, it remains a somewhat impotent job. It’s also significant that Cheney and Biden have gained that power largely through their foreign-policy know-how; there’s not really any precedent for the vice president leading a major overhaul of the federal budget. Meanwhile, Ryan has managed to obtain a position of great power from his perch in the House; his seat is safe, and he is the undisputed GOP budget king. Why leave such a sinecure? He’s young enough that he’ll still have plenty of shots at the White House, cabinet, or Senate if he wants them, whereas it’s unclear where he’d go after four or eight years as VP.

There is one possible reason he might do it, if offered the chance. House Republicans installed term limits for chairs and ranking members of committees when they took over in 1994. Ryan, having served as ranking member since 2006, is term-limited after this year. He has said he hopes someday to leader the powerful Ways and Means Committee, but its current chair, Michigan’s Dave Camp, doesn’t reach his limit until 2014. GOP leaders could grant Ryan a waiver through 2014 to keep him in his current spot; that’s something they’ve been reluctant to do, but given Ryan’s status within the party, they might make an exception.

Romney and Ryan have spent some time stumping together and Romney’s willingness to praise the Ryan plan shows he’s not terrified about its political risks. But overall, the Ryan buzz — not unlike his budget — just doesn’t completely add up.

via Politics : The Atlantic http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2012/08/why-a-paul-ryan-vp-selection-wouldnt-add-up-for-mitt-romney/260757/

Junkie read by WSB online for free

If you’re a fan of William Burroughs’ work, a complete reading of Junkie, by William Burroughs himself, has recently appeared online, for free. Junkie (alternately titled Junky) is a 1953 semi-autobiographical novel by William S. Burroughs, published initially under the pseudonym “William Lee”. It was his first published novel and has come to be considered a seminal text on the lifestyle of heroin addicts in the early 1950s. Also some Burroughs movies, which include The Cut-Up Films, interviews, Burroughs The Movie and Shotgun Paintings.

via MetaFilter http://www.metafilter.com/118676/Junkie-read-by-WSB-online-for-free

Blackwater Successor to Pay Fine to Settle Arms Charges

The military contractor formerly known as Blackwater Worldwide has agreed to pay a $7.5 million fine to settle charges of arms-sales violations, the Justice Department said.

via NYT > Most Recent Headlines http://www.nytimes.com/2012/08/08/us/blackwater-successor-to-pay-fine-to-settle-arms-charges.html

‘Arrested Development’ Begins Production; Jason Bateman Tweets First Look (Photo)


Michael Bluth himself gave fans an early look at season four of the much-loved comedy, which hits Netflix next year.

read more

via Hollywood Reporter http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/live-feed/arrested-development-season-4-jason-bateman-359250?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+thr%2Fnews+%28The+Hollywood+Reporter+-+Top+Stories%29

‘Daily Show’ Nabs Robert Pattinson’s First Interview Post-Kristen Stewart Cheating Fiasco


The actor, who is promoting his new film “Cosmopolis,” will visit Jon Stewart’s show Monday, followed by the ABC morning program two days later.

read more

via Hollywood Reporter http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/news/robert-pattinson-kristen-stewart-cheated-cosmopolis-359218?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+thr%2Fnews+%28The+Hollywood+Reporter+-+Top+Stories%29

NBC Buys ‘Freakonomics’-Inspired Drama Procedural Produced By Kelsey Grammer

Nellie Andreeva

NBC has bought Pariah, a drama project from Lionsgate Television and Kelsey Grammer’s Grammnet Prods. Written by Kevin Fox (The Negotiator, Law & Order: SVU), the police procedural features characters inspired by the economic theory ‘Freakonomics’ made popular by authors/economists Steven Levitt & Stephen Dubner. In Pariah, the Mayor of San Diego appoints a rogue academic with no law enforcement background to run a task force using Freakonomics-inspired alternative methods of policing. This causes an uproar within the police department as the morally conflicted, conspiracy-minded academic solves crimes by conducting his controversial experiments on citizens of the city. Grammer and Grammnet’s Stella Stolper and Brian Sher will executive produce, with Levitt and Dubner attached as producers. The project extends Grammnet’s relationship with Lionsgate — the two companies also co-produce the Grammer-starring Starz drama Boss. Grammnet, whose head of development Brian Taylor has spearheaded Pariah, and Levitt & Dubner are repped by WME. Fox is with Gersh.

via Deadline.com http://www.deadline.com/2012/08/nbc-buys-freakonomics-inspired-drama-procedural-produced-by-kelsey-grammer/